We’ve had quite a bit of time to reflect on our life and what it is that we really want. Though for some of us, the times may still be wearing down on our motivation to ” just keep going “. One thing is clear, if we can see what it is we don’t want, then, it is information to help us know what we do want to feel more joy in our every day lives and hope for the future. I say this to my clients all the time, “knowing what we don’t want, gives us information on what we do want”.
Knowing what we don't want,
gives us information on what we do want.
For example, a client once told me that they lost their motivation at work to do something that they used to love to do. They noticed that they didn’t look forward to work as much and would rather hit the snooze button than get ready for work. Most of the time, we never give ourselves the time or have the tools to figure out why we might feel so drained. So, our job, was to figure out what else was going on that was causing this drop in energy and motivation. How is that done?
The key to being more happy than sad is having the ability to gather information on the environment within us and outside of us. The signs are always there – it’s just a matter of knowing what they are first and deciding what to do with those signs. This is where a coach comes in handy, we offer tools and strategies for easy progression and for consistent change. The key to success however comes with teaming up with a motivated client that is willing to move themselves forward using the tools I provide. This helps gauge sense of satisfaction with day-to-day life and overtime have more good feeling days and more hopeful and happy future. This all takes serious work and a commitment to follow through with our self emotionally, spiritually, physically, socially, and intellectually.
So how is this all done? What information does our environment provide for us and what tools are available to help us hone in on the signs and choose between what works for us and what doesn’t?
The reality is we cannot ride unicorns over rainbows all the way to our Cloud 9 vision board goals. We have to actively choose to work toward our goal.
Here are some ways that we can begin to understand how and where the deep personal work is done in order to reach your Cloud 9.
#1: Assess your life: Where are you at?
In my iPEC Coach training (2015, 2018 Schneider), we were trained to offer a general assessment for personal development called the Energy Leadership Index Assessment (ELI). The ELI is used to assess the presence of stress or tension in life and we discuss where and how this might show up. The more abbreviated version that I use with clients to explore where they are at is using the Wheel of Life here I provide prompts for clients to be able to see where they might be feeling tension come up in their life.
#2: Be realistic: Honesty pays off no matter how hard it is to face.
It’s like looking at the bill that you know you need to look at, but, have avoided for so long. The reality is we cannot ride unicorns over rainbows all the way to our Cloud 9 vision board goals. We have to actively choose to work toward our goal. The hardest part is facing reality. The easiest part is figuring out a plan for how to address the big glaring challenges ahead of us and to tackle them head-on. As a coach, my number one priority is to develop trust and to play a supporting role that helps my clients step into the challenge and work of being honest with themselves. By being able to identify the areas of our lives that could improve, even if it means letting go or moving on, our honesty with ourselves is the first step to knowing what works and what doesn’t work for us.
#3: Take small steps: Develop tools and strategies along the way that hardwire you for success.
Once you’ve identified the challenge, take the next best step, no matter how small closer to overcoming it. For example, this could be gathering more information on how to clean up that credit score, setting up a payment plan for a big bill, or simply listening to a podcast on how to deal with “X” challenging situation. The benefit of coaching is that at the end of every coaching session, the client can reflect on their learning, develop a challenge for the week ahead, or continue to execute a plan. Every session is an intentional step forward into trying a new approach, actively choosing how to engage in a current challenge, or changing a perspective on a difficult situation, people or tasks.
#4: Have a plan: Stick to it.
Every big goal has a plan in place. You want to develop a plan that is realistic, has a clear timeline and key benchmarks and that is hardwired for potential challenges (and inevitable ones) that will come up along the way. As a coach, my role is to support you through your challenges by keeping the plan at bay and developing tools that work for you. Oftentimes, we will create experiments or ‘pilot’ different approaches that will help us refine our approach to strategies and designs that work for you. The key is that we are able to develop a plan, give it a go (sometimes, course correct) and stick to it to the end.
These are just steps you can take today or when you are ready. If you’d like to schedule a free-session with me to explore possibilities you can schedule one below or e-mail me at: kapiolani@indigenouslifecoach.com.